Thursday, June 16, 2011

TWISTED TALES: A Badassery Mash-Up of Action Heroes

Beware  If strong language including the use of the taboo 'F-word' in stories sends you screaming with horror to the bathroom where you'll frantically wash your eyes, ears and possibly the dirty taste in your mouth out, this post should be avoided. For those sickos who are still reading...welcome to this week's Twisted Tales feature. We are proud and glad to have you. You're officially a member of the club!

It's time to get twisted with the mash-up action hero tale, Rico Slade. Let's see if you can name or rather, recognize all the American action icons that make a cameo appearances in this psychotic break from reality. What happens when therapy goes horribly wrong?  Hollywood is in serious trouble! Fan fiction fun for the whole dysfunctional family!

Rico Slade Will Fucking Kill YouRico Slade Will F'ing Kill You!
Author Bradley Sands

What the crap is Arnold Schwarzenegger doing on the cover of Rico Slade’s book? This is Rico Slade’s goddamn book. Rico Slade is not a body builder, an actor, or a governor. Rico Slade is an action hero. Rico Slade doesn’t care about the political climate. Rico Slade has an advanced degree in badassery. Rico Slade’s favorite food is the honey-roasted peanut. Rico Slade can rip out a throat with his bare hands. But Rico Slade has a problem. His arch-nemesis, Baron Mayhem, is threatening to drop a bomb on the Earth that will kill every human being except himself while leaving the world’s currency intact. To save the planet, Rico Slade must journey across Hollywood to find Baron Mayhem. Unfortunately, Rico Slade’s crime fighting style involves ripping out the throat of anyone who gets in his way, including grandmothers and Midwestern tourists. As Rico Slade leaves Hollywood in ruins, the only person who can stop him from destroying the city is his Jewish psychologist, Harold Schwartzman. Until he does, Rico Slade will kill as many people as it takes to thwart Baron Mayhem’s evil scheme.

Bradley Sands
Bradley Sands Will Probably NOT Kill You
He writes absurdist comedies that demolish the walls of reality. He lives in Boulder, CO, where he edits Bust Down the Door and Eat All the Chickens (A Journal of Absurd and Surreal Fiction). He experienced enlightenment after walking into a bookstore and being shocked to see his picture on the cover of Your Four-Year-Old: Wild and Wonderful. Visit his website for all kinds of bizarro links at:  Also, below is a feature and links to the online journal Sands currently edits.  Most issues are currently available through Amazon.
Click on image to visit site

Current Issue:   Y'aing'ngah (Winter 2010)
Download for FREE at Smashwords!
Previous Issues still available: 
Bust Down the Door and Eat All the Chickens: Issue 8Bust Down the Door and Eat All the Chickens: Issue 5Bust Down the Door and Eat All the Chickens: Issue 6Bust Down the Door and Eat All the Chickens: Issue 9
Where else can you stalk Bradley Sands?  You'll find him where all the crazies and weirdos hang out.  Yep, that dark, awkward corner of the internet where cult-like writers lurk sniffling and scribbling wildly in journals made from recycled waste. Beware, it smells kind of funny, but you'll get used to it after a few drinks.
Bizarro Central:

For the respectable crowd and those still pretending, please visit:
Goodreads Bradley Sands 

* Bio information and various links/images were borrowed and provided by the author and his sites. Any requests for use should be sent directly to the moderator of original sites.


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